Oh those kids - facebook statuses

I tend to document the kids entertaining/unique moments in my facebook statuses, and I realized I should put them somewhere where I can read them again.  So started from today and going back to May 1, here are all the ones related to the kids, too many for me to change all the names, so if you're someone creepy. ..  .well go away anyway!

‎"Ava go put your swimsuit in the bathtub."
"It needs to go in the bathtub so it can dry."
"Um........." she stands, a finger to her cheek and looks thoughtful, "Um......No." and walks away.

Maddie: ‎"Mom! My awkwards!" Um, those are called goggles. "Oh, right, my goggles!"

Maddie: But Princesses don't do Easter stuff. Only Humans. Princesses are not humans. Human girls can only be Human princesses. A witch can turn a Princess into a Human Princess.

I coughed hard, trying to clear my throat of post nasal drip, and Ava calls from the other room: "Okay?!" I didn't know who she was talking to until she repeats herself, "Okay Mom?!" Such a sweetheart!

heard from Maddie as she put away her farm puzzle, "Oh sorry piggy, I'm going to break your head off. . . I took your eye cow!. . . . . There go your toes duck."

‎"Abby? Abby? ABBY! ABBY?" is what I hear from Ava wandering the house. "Oh there you are." She says finding me in the bathroom. "Abby? Poopy?" Yes. Thank you child, I'm poopy. " 's okay. I like you Abby." she says and walks away still calling "Abby!" Oy.

Ava found a travel size bottle of baby wash. PIcks it up gets a delighted smile on her face, hide it behind her back and notices me watching. "Hi Mom" she says oozing innocence. . . .

While I was napping, the man did dishes, cleaned off the stove, cleaned out the sinks, cleaned the bottom of the fridge so we could put the drawers back in (elk blood dripped down there a few weeks ago. . . .), made dinner, put dinner away, got the kids ready and into bed. Such a keeper!!

Maddie randomly walks in the room. "Do you know where the black thing is? The black thing with a handle?"  (turned out to be a lap desk)

nothing quite like hearing your child shriek "Show! show! show! show!" from the moment she wakes up to make you realize you're failing miserably at raising nature loving hippie kids.

Ava's 18 month shorts are too big at the waist and fell below her diaper. Daddy told her to pull them up. So she tried, and then tried, and dad says Pull by your bum, so she tries, then says "Sorry, Won't work."

Um, incase you're the sort that is entertained by mixing koolaid flavors. . .cherry + lemon-lime does not a cherry lime-ade make. It's more like stomach acid. . . .Maddie informed me, "This juice has gone bad."

Ava tripped and said "Ouch my teeth". Oh no! I replied, should we pull them all out? Ava nods, uh huh! then tries to do so. . .

"Mom I need help getting a green bowl. Lots of other bowls are stuck on them." Aka, I want the bowl on the BOTTOM of the stack. Never mind the one on the very top is easily accessible. . .

Too cute. Ava is in the other room watching Blues Clue's while I clean the main room. Every so often she pops in her to tell me, oh so seriously, random tidbits relating to the show such as "Baby. Ya. Baby." Or "Neigh." And waits for a response.

Out of Maddie's mouth as she plays with the rainbow stacker "Welcome to rainbow land! Go to rainbowland.com to learn more!"
My child is warped.

Ava was watching an episode of Blue's Clues where they're getting ready for bed. . .at the end of it she came to me and said "Nap. Bottle." And yep, she's happily in bed for her nap now!

Ava got a play cell phone for her birthday. . .one of buttons makes it say "Hi want to play outside?" to which she always answers with a very firm "Yes."

LOL, Ava figured out how to wind the old Fisher Price learning clock. . . .and for some reason thinks she has to spin around in a circle while the music plays. . .

Oh my goodness. . .Ava is the hardest kid to discipline! I have to struggle to keep a straight face sometimes, the kid is so comical, and always practically skips off to time out. . .

Me: "Maddie, can I borrow your scissors real quick?"
Maddie: "What are handle bars?"

Lying in bed. Sound a sleep. Drowsily open my eyes before shifting to new position to find another face mere inches from mom own. Insert sharp and loud gasp along with my jumping at least a foot. Guess we still need to work on personal space. . . .and I need to remember to plug the TV back in before I go to bed.

Thinks it's hilarious how well her 4 yr old can navigate Netflix. Don't know what time she got up this morning, but she watched 3 kid shows on it, Veggie Tales, Eloise, and Caillou

Me: "okay Maddie, I'm at the same table as you. I don't need a play by play."
Maddie: "Actually, You should say craft by craft. Cause it's a craft, not play."

At lunch, she got her foot stuck in the chair. I helped her get it out and reminded her that's why we sit properly in our chairs. So what happens at dinner?. . . .she gets her foot stuck in the exact same way. Really maddie? Really?

Maddie comes to me with a giant pixy stix: Mom, what's these?
Me: It's a Pixy Stix.
Maddie: What's inside? Pixies?. . . .Why are you laughing?

Oh that darling. . . .Ava is sitting in the window (grandparent's have 12 inch window sills. . ) with her hands and face pressed against it exclaiming "Daddy!" everytime a car goes by, then sadly saying Daddy. . . when it's not him.

You know your kid is just as sassy as you thought when Grandma comments on how she doesn't envy your having to deal with the kid as a teenager. And this from a woman who raised 8 kids! Oh Maddie, hopefully we'll both live through it!

Me: Ava, can you share? Please share?
Ava: Please, no.

We went to the dollar store today and Maddie was having issues listening and asking for EVERYTHING, so she lost the snack that she had picked out. After I said no we don't need to get craft supplies, she informs me: "When I'm a mom, I'm going to let my kids do what they want!" Oh I can't wait to tell her about that in 20 years. . . .

The girl's conversation as we drove to Ikea. . .
Maddie: We're friends aren't we!
Ava: Ya!
Maddie: But not really. . . .
Ava: Ya!
Maddie: because you don't share so good sometimes.
Ava: *screams*

Me: You two need to stop fighting!
Maddie: It's not us, it's our babies!

You know it's been a while since you put your kid in a cloth diaper when she's looking at you like you're nuts and shanking her head no as she watches you fold it. . .

Maddie was the last one at the dinner table, had like 3 bites of strawberries and yogurt left. I told her to finish and left the room for a few minutes . When I came back she was getting up and the bowl in front of her was empty. . .just discovered she switched her bowl with Ava's in the sink and stuck her spoon in Ava's empty bowl. . . .What a sneak!


Jennifer said…
This is such a cute idea! Great way to remember these moments...and when they are making you crazy you can refer to it and smile
Laurel said…
my favorite is rainbowland.com!
Emily Robertson said…
HAHAHA!!! Oh man! I love my little neices =)
sleepless said…
Okay..this was just HILARIOUS !! Thanks for the laugh. It is awesome that you have these memories for them !

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